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When did you first realize you were a grown-up?
I saw this question in a magazine and had to stop and think what my answer would be. I love questions that make me stop, close my eyes tight and really give it some thought. For me, going back more than 5 years in my memory seems to get harder and harder, the older I get.
So for this question, I really had to think hard. When did I first feel grown-up?
I want to say it was when I had my first taste of alcohol on my 21st birthday... but that didn't really do it. I actually remember feeling really let down at how dull sipping an alcoholic drink was. I think I thought something magical was going to happen, but I felt the same and was quickly disappointed.
Then I thought getting married would make me feel grown-up, but that didn't really work in my favor either. Instead, I felt like a little kid again, learning all the new, exciting and confusing ways of my new world. I think, for me, becoming a Mom was the first time I truly stopped and realized, "Wow! I've grown up!" I laid there in the hospital bed, looking at my beautiful son (even with his funny cone shaped head) and realized for the first time in my life, I was in charge of another human being. I was the caregiver and provider for this tiny, little being. I remember feeling overwhelmed by the sudden responsibility and in some ways, wanting to give it back, for fear that I'd mess-up. When Ethan was 2 days old and we were first home from the hospital, I was changing his first real poopy diaper, starting to leak milk (yay for milk coming in!), the phone was ringing like mad, and he was screaming out of hunger. I got him into a new diaper, grabbed a blanket, gladly let the phone go to the machine and started to nurse him. I remember looking at him (while he ate like there was no tomorrow) and saying to him "We're a team now, buddy." Seems like silly words, but it was in that moment I realized the weight of my responsibility, but also the joy that came along with it.
Then I think the next time was hearing Ethan call me "Mama". I remember crying the first time he said it. I walked into his room one morning and there he was, sitting in his crib, playing happily with some toys. He looked up, our eyes met, he smiled and yelled "Mama!!" ... and I melted.
But, if we're being totally honest here, I'd have to say the first (and not so exciting) time I realized I had become a grown-up, was when the thought of an afternoon nap seemed so deliciously wonderful to me.
What about you?